this.

Until this day, reading this makes me cry…

I found myself praying for peace today. I’ve been in and out of my mind a thousand times I know You heard me. I know I wasn’t alone in that room, shaking with the fear of fear, the harrowing loneliness.

I cried out to You on my hands. On my knees. With my face pushed down against the ground. If I could have gotten lower, I swear I would. Because that is helplessness, the truest kind… The kind that knows nothing, not one leaf, or tear, or smile can be without Him. I learned something today. Again.

This is dunya. Dunya. Not a place of ease. Only glitter. The place where you have to feel cold and hungry. The place where you have to worry and feel scared. The place where it gets cold. So cold, sometimes.

The place where you have to leave the people you love. Where you can’t get attached, because even if you do, it doesn’t make it stay, it just makes it hurt when it doesn’t. The place where happiness and sadness are only players, waiting for their next line in a play… Competing for their place on stage. The place where gravity makes you fall, and frailty makes you bleed. The place where sadness exists, because it must. And tears fall to remind you of a place where they don’t. Where they just don’t.

And isn’t that just it? Isn’t Jannah that place after all, that place that Allah describes over and over and over in 2 ways?: “La khawfun alayhim wa la hum yahzanoon… (On them shall be no fear…nor shall they grieve.)”

But I’m still here, aren’t I? The scar on my flesh reminds me of that. The burn on my arm left a scar that I love. I love it because it reminds me how weak I am. How human. That I burn. That I bleed. That I break. That I scar. Yes. It is here that I am. Here that I fall. Here that I cry. Here, just the same, that You filled that room, and lifted me to humbleness, and an acute knowledge of my own powerlessness and excruciating need for You.

And then You took care of it. Of course You did. Of course. Like Younus, and Musa, and his mother. You took care of it. You are the Peace of the peaceful. The Strength of the strong. The lighthouse of Truth in this storm of lies. So, I found myself praying for peace today.

“whatever is with you will be exhausted (vanished or passed away), and whatever is with Allah, still remains. and those who are patients, We will be certainly pay them a reward for the best of what they did.

Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, who are a true believer, verily we will definitely give him a happy life in this world. and we will pay them a reward in the Hereafter such as Paradise according to of what best of what they did.”

-[An-Nahl 16:96-97]

A boy said to a man: “I want happiness.”
The man said: “Remove ‘I’—that is your ego.
Remove ‘want’—that is your desire.
And what remains is happiness.

Keep your expectations of life positive. Strive to live with unceasing happiness. Let not your possessions possess you, nor the petty details of worldly life invade with hordes of worry the stillness of your heart.

Gain strength to rise above distraction by sipping frequently the nectar of inner peace, given you lovingly by angel hands as you grow silently toward Self-realization.

(via thelittlephilosopher)

it is easy to lie.
and it is hard to tell the truth.
that’s why people keep on lyin’.
it is like you were busy going to the
other complicated directions
without being conscious that
happiness run through you
straight away wanted to reach
you.

(via ririnara)

(via thebeautyofislam)

thatseeker:

There was a period in my life where I went through depression, and I once tried to commit suicide. Alhamdulillah, it did not work. I did it because I was selfish. I did it because I did not care about anyone, and there was no incentive to lead a better life. I did it because death was a way to stop the bad things from happening. I did it because I was an atheist.

Getting to know God through Islam solved many questions for me. It solved, primarily, how I am here, why I am here. It solved why suffering occurs. Religion has taught me that suffering was a way for me to become a better person, to learn from my mistakes, and a way to overwhelm and counteract against the sins I keep on committing.

Getting to know God through Islam showed me the light, the path, the truth. In the dusty recesses of my mind, through the dark dungeons, torches burst into flames that allayed all fears, conquered all terrors, and sparked a fervent desire for self-improvement. As a friend of mine tells me, Islam is not a religion… it is a state of being.

Atheism nearly cost me my life.

Islam has given me a rebirth.

Alhamdulillah. Masha’Allah.

Islam has given me the chance to become a new person, appreciate the brilliance of life through the tough times, smile more often, and lead a better life. I leave you with a quote to help you through times of sacrifice and suffering. Allah Hafiz!

“Verily, with hardship comes ease.” - The Holy Qur’an (Surah 94:5)

-  Nasir Al-Din

(via thebeautyofislam)

(via thefreenomad)